Frazer Blog

How-To Guide: What to Write in a Sympathy Card

by | Dec 31, 2018 | For Families

woman writing in her notebook

It may not be possible to find the right words to say when someone’s loved one dies, and that’s okay.

A sympathy card isn’t meant to be perfect; it’s meant to show you care and want to provide support and honor their loved one’s memory. Just a simple short and sweet note is all it takes.

Below are a few sympathy card writing tips to use as a starting point.

Express Sympathy, Gratitude, and Support

When writing your note, there are three main things to include: sympathy, gratitude, and support. First, express your sympathy for their loss. Then, if applicable, share your gratitude for knowing the deceased. If you didn’t know the deceased personally, you can share some kind words instead or say that they’ll be missed by many.

Lastly, you can show your support, but don’t give any unsolicited advice. Simply say that you’re there for them, and they can come to you for support if needed.

Avoid Controversial Phrases

You should avoid phrases that could be found offensive or seem insensitive, such as:

  • “I know how you feel.”
  • “Everything happens for a reason.”
  • “They were so young.”
  • “You’ll get over it.”
  • “It was their time.”

Additionally, it’s best to avoid bringing up details about how they died or their illness, if applicable.

Sympathy Card Sample Text

Here are a few ready-to-use sympathy card messages to help you write your own!

I’m/We’re deeply saddened to hear about the loss of (insert name). I’m/We’re grateful to have known (insert name), as they brought so much joy into my life/our lives. Please don’t hesitate to give me/us a call if you need anything.”

“My/Our heart(s) go out to you and your family for the loss of (insert name). I’m/We’re thankful for the happy memories I/we have with them. I’m/We’re always here for you.”

“I’m/We’re sorry to hear about the loss of (insert name). They were a kindhearted person that will never be forgotten. Your family is in my/our thoughts and prayers.”

I/We are heartbroken about the loss of (insert name). They will be missed by many people. I’m/We’re only a phone call away if you need me/us.”

I’m/We’re at a loss for words about the loss of (insert name). I/We will always treasure the moments we had with (insert name). Let me/us know how I/we can help support you during this difficult time.”

You also can send follow-up notes to see how they’re doing, but don’t overwhelm them. They may need some space to grieve their loss privately.

For tips on sending sympathy texts or social media messages, check out this blog post!

What tips do you have for expressing your condolences when someone loses a loved one? Share them with us in the comments!


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